Rejecting History is Not Benign

Erasing history, willfully forgetting our past, and denying Truth—these are not benign actions. We cannot, out of self-interest, ego, fear, or even misplaced compassion, destroy and reject what has come before. We are all–individuals, states, and nations–imperfect. None of us ever attains the ideal, because that is not only impossible, but it is also in the very striving towards the highest good and in the failing and trying and failing and trying that we actually come close to it.

But if we think we are growing closer to the ideal by denigrating everything that has come before now and all of our failings, we are not only misguided, but also contributing to the worsening of culture. Curiosity, perspective, and even wisdom can only emerge when we are able to admit our shortcomings, declare that we have fallen short and learned, and then evolve into greater clarity and understanding. Without a sense of history, whether in the form of words, statues, songs, beliefs, laws, etc., we are rendered ignorant. We are destined to walk into the future with a naive view of the world, our place in it, and our responsibility to it.

Shockingly, many would have us deny the very logos that the likes of Frederick Douglass and Martin Luther King, Jr. espoused. In a twisted attempt to uphold unity, they are actually advocating a type of neo-segregation–one that demands we judge on color, race, sex, and class before all else. Throw in judgement on the basis of our health status and political views and we have a culture that can only be driven by depression, fear, anger, suspicion, and adherence to group-think. There is no room for the individual in this society. Only the group you represent matters.

Without historical perspective, young people especially have no idea where this leads. But we know. We have seen it before.

What is the answer? We must never lose sight of the profound significance of the individual–her curiosity, desire to thrive, be free, and aspire to the greatest good. We must not allow fear and suspicion to infect our ability to think clearly, act freely, and work for the betterment of all men and women by committing to our own integrity.

The ancients and mystics recognized that Being is defined by these essential qualities: truth, goodness, and beauty. If this is true, then color, race, sex, class, and all such capricious categories are fundamentally toxic and only cause greater separation. As we do in the natural world, we celebrate our uniquenesses and differences. We admire the beauty that variety displays. But we do so while acknowledging and being grateful for the belonging and connection that come not from our differences, but rather from the unity that comes from something far greater. While shapes, colors, behavior, and habitats differ, it is the spirit, the Divine essence in every living thing that joins us. And it is this spirit that gives rise to character and the fundamental nature of who we are.

Those wise men and women who have come before us have affirmed it is by our character that we are known and even judged. Will we attend to these prophets? Will we listen to and study our history? Or will we insist on rejecting it and refusing to teach it out of an allegiance to an agenda? Let us be mindful that doing so is not benign. For by refusing to mind the enlightened wisdom of the past, we are ensuring that the present and future are steeped in darkness.

As for myself, I choose to remember and strive for the light, no matter how imperfect it may be.

Aim High and Move Forward

The purpose of life is not to get everything we want. The purpose of life is not to make sure the waters we sail in are smooth all the time. The purpose of life is not to live free of pain and suffering.

The purpose is to become all we can be, to contribute to the world in a meaningful way, to make life better by becoming the best version of ourselves.

How do we do this? Aim high, reach, stretch, and look forward, and do all of this with as much goodness, kindness, and commitment to Truth as you can muster.

What if the mark I’m aiming for isn’t high enough? What if I fail? What if I’m wrong?

So what? The meaning is in the trying. The purpose is to pick something and go for it. Each step will lead to another and another and another.

It is not in the goal that the meaning of life appears. It is in the moving towards it that we uncover our purpose and new ways of expanding and evolving. It is in the inspired action that we discover our true strength.

What Are You Carrying?

Pick up the heaviest thing you can and carry it. –Jordan Peterson

As a mother and a human who is committed to nurturing, nourishing, and comforting others, especially my children, I choose and try everyday to live consciously, mindfully, and with as open a heart as I can. I’m not always as successful as I’d like to be, but I believe in choosing alignment as much as possible and aiming high.

There is admittedly a downside, though, to attending solely to the emotional, mystical, and spiritual realm. Without grounding, we can float away. We don’t want to become shackled by the isness of life, but ignoring it can also lead us to confusion in an arena with no boundaries or markers that show us where we are and where we’re headed.

What can be a useful antidote to getting lost in the ethereal, the chaotic, and an over abundance of limitlessness?

Well, the answer at least in part is focusing on the tangible, the orderly, and doing the next right thing in form. 

Too much “reality” makes us stiff and brittle, but too much transcendence can cause us to feel unable to take action.

Sometimes, we just need to choose to attend to our responsibilities and be useful. Sometimes it’s not the dream state that will assist us, but rather the decision to take the next right action. 

Sometimes, we just need to “pick up the heaviest thing we can and carry it.” 

Maybe this is an actual thing, like taking out the trash, walking the dog, making the bed, or getting the groceries out of the car. Or perhaps we respond metaphorically by having that difficult conversation, attending to a sad child, or visiting our friend in a nursing home. 

The heaviness of the thing can vary too. Maybe the heaviest thing you can lift is a grocery bag filled with strawberries or thanking your mom for picking you up at your friend’s house. Or perhaps the thing is really heavy, like the box of books you’re taking to the new house or calling your sister after a dispute.

The thing, real or figurative, doesn’t matter. The point is we’re attending to something that matters—to us and to others. We are being helpful, useful, and making a difference. 

Strangely enough, it’s in the isness, in the action, that something mystical actually happens: our spirit, our open-heartedness expands and evolves. Chaos and order, creativity and stability are constantly flowing and dancing and moving together. 

This is the life force and journey. Paying attention to this movement is what gives life meaning. 

What are you carrying today?

Dear Children

To all the young people who experience sadness, worry, or fear, this is for you.

Dear Children:

Are you sometimes sad? Worried? Afraid?

You are not broken or disorderd. You are the sensitive souls who feel deeply, see everything, and pay attention to your environment and others in it. This makes you not only incredibly special, but also essential to your friends, family, community, and world.

The question isn’t, how do you stop feeling? The question is, how can you direct these sensitivities in ways that help you feel productive, worthy, and contribute to the world?

Maybe you’re asking, what’s wrong with me? If so, let me tell you as a fellow human on this planet, nothing is wrong with you. You are right where you need to be right now. Whatever you’re feeling is inviting you to more. More, more, more. And asking for more always comes with disquiet, uncertainty, and often sadness or worry.

But this is where you are! You are breaking open to something new. You are being called simultaneously to intimate heart-centeredness and also Christ-inspired connection to people, things, ideas, and energies beyond your immediate ability to actually see them. They are there, though, no doubt. That you are feeling the way you are means you are discerning all that is calling you.

You are strong. You are always connected to Love and God. We see you. We are here for you. And we can’t wait to watch you burst forth into yourself. Again and again and again.

We Are Vast and Evolving

We are becoming all the time.

Sometimes we experience the Dark Night, because we are confused, unsure, even feeling hopeless. Other times, this darkness evokes overwhelm, even paralysis, as Abraham says, because, in the midst of so many choices, even those we don’t yet see, we feel stuck. We freeze. This response is actually a primal one. When in fear or vulnerability, we instinctively know to stay put, not even breathe, so that we might not draw attention to ourselves.

If we can, however, surrender to this feeling and know we can move through it, we could change how we perceive ourselves and the situation. We could, in fact, change everything. We might feel stuck or frozen for a moment (or two or three), but if we could then experience it, witness it as stillness rather than mortal fear and paralysis, we could actually begin to invite the evolution that is calling us.

Nothing grows, evolves, is born without a breaking open. This is how all life, all energy, calls itself forward–calls itself to itself. It is in the darkness, the unknowing, that we can receive the light of all being, which is inherently true, good, and beautiful. This being is simultaneously the vastness and the potential. These essences and energies are in us and calling us all the time.

Let us allow ourselves to see and hear and heed the call of our becoming. Our evolution is inevitable, but we must first align with it in order to become what we are called to be.

How Are We Seeing the World?

So many parents I know are saying the same thing: my kids are anxious. They have been in school and are still having a hard time. Or they are only just now going back to school after a year of online school, and they are worried, fearful, and just not themselves.

Here is my response to all of us who are walking through this new world with our kids.

This is so upsetting. And yet so understandable. These kids have been holed up, restricted, everything’s been taken away from them. Society has taught them to be afraid and to be suspicious of others and illness.

And then we say, “But now, go back to school. And be happy. Be normal. Even though you need to stay afraid. But you’re fine. No? What’s wrong with you? Why are you so anxious?”

Seriously? With all our knowledge and statistics and information, we are doing a terrible job of the most important thing: teaching our kids that they are worthy, whole, healthy, vibrant, capable, and strong, no matter what. Unconditionally. Always.

And we can’t just tell them. We have to show them, be for them, examples of connection to goodness, kindness, and abundance. We can teach, but even more, we have to be this ourselves, for they have to discover this for themselves in their own hearts and minds. We have taught them to look around and assess how scary the world is. How mean and awful it is. No. Enough. We see the world not how it is but how we are.

If how we are isn’t bright and grateful and constantly in search of the Good, then how will we find it? How will they? It’s time to stop the madness of lack and fear and begin to rebuild. Our children’s wellness, our wellness, depend on it.

Do I Have Inner Knowing?

Recently, an acquaintance asked our group of coaches and counselors this question: How would we respond to a client who says she doesn’t believe she has “inner knowing?”

This is a good question. Perhaps one of the most important questions.

Why? It’s significant, because inner knowing, or what we might call intuition, an inner voice, or even a sense of our consciousness, is evidence or affirmation of our connection to a greater energy–God, Source, the Divine, however you language it. This client is hardly alone. Many of us question whether we are “gifted” with this wisdom. The reasons are painfully obvious.

We live in a society, culture, world, that often go to great lengths to deny our inner knowing. They tell us all that exists, all that matters, is what our five senses can detect. We learn at an early age to set goals and intentions so that we might achieve the outward appearance of success: financial wealth, lots of stuff, expensive schools, even celebrity and fame. This, we are instructed, is what’s most important. This is what will declare to the world that we are significant. That we matter. And, of course, it will ensure that above all we are happy. Right?

Well, in the words of Brad Pitt in Fight Club, “How’s that working out for you?” Not so well, I expect, mostly because it’s not true. Even those, and perhaps especially those, who have material wealth and success admit none of this ensures happiness and in fact pales in comparison to a much greater attainment: acknowledging, trusting, believing in our true selves, our inner knowing. Our ultimate calling is not to look and seek without; it is to witness and align with our wisdom, which is our connection to God, Source, the Divine. Without this consciousness and depth of understanding, all else is ultimately folly. Sure, we might achieve things and goals; we might even deem ourselves satisfied and happy. But all of this will be like the mere shadows of things, as they are for the prisoners in Plato’s The Cave. They will never be the truest and highest things, which the Good, the wise, the deepest knowing can provide.

Here is the answer (and more) I offered in response to the question above:

You can compassionately and graciously affirm for her that we all have inner knowing; it is inherent to the human experience. The question isn’t, “Do I have it;” the question is, “To what extent do I realize or not realize/experience it, why or why not, and how do I more effectively practice touching this Divine spark in myself?”

Contemplation, reflection, and meditation are excellent ways to touch this awareness, but if she’s not ready for this, if it’s too early in her journey, there are other ways, too. Suggest taking walks in nature, noticing when she experiences something beautiful or joyful. This could be an image, a person, a thought, a piece of music, something delicious she’s eating. Anything that sparks gratitude and joy and offers a momentary high-vibration feeling. Let her know she can use these moments as touchstones and affirmations that her inner knowing is real and present within her.

Inner knowing isn’t bestowed on us; it emanates from us, from the deepest parts of ourselves, ever connected to God. So if we haven’t yet felt that, sometimes witnessing something inspiring can light that spark and allow us to understand how the knowing flows to and through us. Goodness, Divinity, and the inspired energy of the Holy Spirit are constantly in motion around and in us. When we are conscious of our inner knowing, we are acknowledging the presence of this energy, which awakens us to the present moment and affirms our connection to ourselves and all that is Unified Consciousness. Don’t worry if you feel this part of you is still small or even if you sometimes doubt it. For taking time to witness it, sit with it, attend to it, will nourish this knowing, invite you to expand until you trust in and rely on its wisdom. Your knowing is already complete, because it is eternal, and you are part of this eternity. It is waiting for you to align with it more consistently so that you might experience it in its inherent glory.

The Transcendentals and Philosophy

Why philosophy?

Recently many of my thoughts have been devoted to the contemplation of the Three Transcendentals: Being is defined by what is good, true, and beautiful. And as often occurs when one is particularly mindful of an idea or theme, it is showing up seemingly everywhere. I’m hearing the Transcendentals in videos and lectures, reading about them in literature and essays. Clearly, my attention is tuned to aligning with them in a variety of forms and media.

I share this quotation from Hillsdale College’s Professor Schlueter, which he offers in an inspired online class on Western Philosophy. (If you are interested about such things, I highly recommend it!)

Sit with it. Contemplate it. Does it resonate with you? How does it influence how and what you think?

Oneing with the Sunset

Being reveals Herself in all things.

Our soul is oned to God, unchangeable goodness….(Julian of Norwich)

At a time when we are surrounded by cynicism, when we often feel there is no absolute truth, when everything from politics to religion to education seems upside-down, it’s easy to lose faith and hope in who we are, both as individuals and as a people. BUT here is an anecdote that re-inspired my belief in the goodness of beingness. Yes, it’s a small example, but perhaps it can remind us that when watch and listen for the delicate and profound essence of life, it will reveal itself.

Tonight I decided to walk westward on the promenade in Cape May to catch the sunset. As I approached the end of the walkway that opens onto the beach and reveals a view of the Cape May Lighthouse at the Point, I realized the sun was setting rapidly and I might miss it. I ran to find a spot where I could stand and video the event. And in so doing, I witnessed something wonderful: throngs of people watching and waiting for the blood-orange red orb to drop below the horizon as the lighthouse standing before it stoically shone its great rotating beacon. As the sky turned a Monet palette of red, yellow, violet, and pink and the sun slipped away, people cheered, car horns sounded, and I cried.

Why? Why did we all rally to witness this everyday event? What does this say about us?

I believe, even sometimes in spite of ourselves, we know what’s important. We know what’s truly meaningful. We inherently know what’s good, beautiful, and true (the Three Transcendentals). The sun setting occurs every night, but we know not to take it for granted. Our hearts comprehend the beauty and awe of this event.

For those of us who don’t believe in a higher power, we appreciate the beauty of the colors and the awesomeness of planetary movements.

For those of us who believe in God or Source energy, the sunset is a true manifestation of the Divine, which lives and breathes and moves in all things. It humbles and embraces us. The Divine invites our spirits to merge with Hers, into Herself, feeling a oneness with this sublime eternal energy.

Regardless of why we all gathered tonight to celebrate the sun setting on this Easter Sunday evening, I am grateful to have borne witness to the magnificent sky and to the crowd who cheered it. May this feeling linger in our hearts and inspire us to seek and appreciate all the moments in life that fill our souls with wonder.