Yesterday morning, I called Montgomery County Domestic Relations. I haven’t received child support for May or June, and wanted to see if my husband (soon to be ex, but that’s another blog) had yet been given a date to appear before an officer for another contempt hearing.

A nice lady answered the phone and I began explaining the situation. “Wait a second while I pull up your file,” she declared. “Yes, I see he failed to respond to the officer’s call, so he will be receiving a notice to appear at Domestic Relations.”

“Has a date been set yet?” I asked. 

“No,” she replied. “You’ll receive a letter in the mail.”

“Yes, I know,” I responded. “I’m not trying to be obstinate, but he has only made two payments in 8 months and my children and I haven’t had insurance since he canceled it in October. This will be at least the fourth time we go to DR for contempt. Could you tell me what the protocol is here for people who don’t pay? What is the enforcement process?”

“I see you have a lot of questions,” she answered apathetically, as though I was interrupting her nail filing session (bless her heart). “I suggest you write down all of your questions and bring them with you to your conference.”

“Well, I don’t think this will help,” I answered, becoming agitated. “I’ve been in front of these officers four times just this year, and they have no power to do anything.”

“Again, I suggest you write down your concerns and submit them to the officer,” she replied. (I think she had stopped filing and chose to put on a clear base coat.)

“Okay, so let me ask you this,” I went on. “What is the protocol when a parent has his own business? Can the state garnish his wages?”

“In that case” (this is really good), the state sends him coupons to send in so he can make payments directly himself.”

“I’m sorry, what? You expect a father who isn’t even in your system, refuses to make payments, even though they were reduced by 2/3 back in February, to voluntarily pay me?”

“Well….”

“That’s never going to happen,” I laughed.

“I can only tell you to watch for your letter to appear in the mail,” she responded.

“Yes, well, thanks so much for the information,” I answered. “Bye, bye.”

Where the hell is the bottle of Stoli?

Yup. This is our legal system at work. When they tell you the courts are working in the best interest of women and children, just laugh and say, Sure they are. And do whatever you can to find a way around, through, over, or under them. They should be ashamed of themselves. But just like the self-centered and Narcissistic parents who cheat the system, shame and guilt are not in their vocabulary.